Operation Caffeination

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There are a lot of things that I dislike about mothering. The constant noise, for one, and the sea of bodily fluids that I wade around in day after day, and don’t forget about the worry, the helplessness and the debilitating, bone-crushing guilt that accompanies every decision I make. (Family movie night? We should be outside. Outside? Should’ve made everyone wear sunscreen. Wearing sunscreen? Yeah, um, what kind, because the kind I’m using is probably sterilizing my child as I watch.)

The worst part of all, though?

It ends.

It ends very, very quickly, and things move by at such an astonishing rate that I have already started to lose memories that I would kill to keep.

And for that reason…I left the dishes on the counter this evening, along with four loads of laundry that need to be folded and put away. We never cleaned the playroom up today, either, largely because we never stopped playing. We are all snuggled up in bed now, and we plan to stay this way…as long as we possibly, possibly can.



Written by GRSeim

September 16, 2011 at 2:55 am

One Response

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  1. Oh, how I sympathise with this sentiment. I cringe to think about the fact that we have so very, very few pictures of Gemini in his earliest months, when we were all in such a tumult, and that I was so in and out of Vicodin that I barely remember him at his youngest days. I try to make up for it by taking more and more photos, but I find that the harder I try to remember the moments, the further they slip, and in the end it’s really the sense memories that stay: the feeling of small warm bodies curling up next to mine, the smell of just-washed hair (or, less romantically, freshly-unshod stinky feet).

    I hope you all have as much time together as you need, and then some – the wash will probably get dirty again as soon as it’s folded anyway!


    September 16, 2011 at 5:09 am

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