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10 things about D, age 3 and 8 months

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1. “I had a dream last night, Mom,” you commented this morning, nonchalantly dipping your pistachios in your apple juice, as one is wont to do.

“I dreamed that there was an earthquake at our house, and all the light bulbs started exploding and the sirens were going off like this WAAAAAAOOOOO-WAAAAAOOOOO! And I was crying and looking for my mommy and I couldn’t find you anywhere!”

You’ve had a lot of nightmares lately, but this one really killed me. I. Never. Leave. I am literally, ALWAYS here, no more than ten feet away from you, EVER. Where is this coming from?And…no, really, where is this coming from? I skip the scary parts of “Kipper the Dog” for you! I don’t let you watch the intro to “The Big Bang Theory” because I worry that all those flashy images will give you nightmares (or seizures…I hate that intro). The scariest thing that has ever happened to you was getting yelled at (by me!) for trying to run out in front of a car. You made it about six steps before I caught you; you were still well away from the street and had no chance of getting hurt.

Why all these nightmares and stresses and worries? Where is it all coming from? I feel so helpless here.

2. I played my first video game ever when I was 19 and I never really developed any interest in gaming at all, on any level, like, even a little…it’s not my thing, at all. And your favorite game right now is Rescue on Cocoa Farm. You want me to *participate* here. I have to watch, and comment, and offer helpful tips and play the hardest levels for you. I try to think of this as bonding time, but honestly I can’t think of a way that this game could be made any stupider and it drives me crazy having to sit there and melt chocolate blocks with you during the one semi-break I get each day. This is not my favorite.

3. It takes forty years to brush your teeth, and I always end up covered in tooth paste and spit. And you spray water all over my mirror, too, every time. I’m always just a little queasy by the time you’ve galloped off to your next activity, leaving me to clear up the wreckage left behind. How can one small child make such an enormous mess?!

4. You kicked me out of the house today the second your daddy walked through the door because apparently I “ruin all the parties.” I am more than ok with getting some time to myself, but still. Don’t bite the hand that has planned, prepped for and cleaned up after every single party you’ve ever experienced! Punk.

5. Waking me up in the morning by blowing raspberries on my armpit: noooooot coooooool!

6. We were having a rough afternoon the other day and, in a moment of desperation, I taught you how to do that trick where you pretend to pop your eyeball out, swish it around in your mouth and then pop it back into its socket. Cool, I know. But you have taken it to the next level: you’ll pretend to pop both eyeballs out, spit them out of your mouth and then stumble around with your eyes squeezed shut, blindly searching for your missing eyeballs. Your Nana screamed with laughter when you did that trick for her, and she’s convinced I taught you the whole bit…but no, you really did come up with that on your own. You’re just that funny. 🙂

7. You’ve added an adorable new twist to our morning routine lately: while I prepare breakfast, you grab an enormous play silk and make a clubhouse for yourself and your sister. You two will stay in there for ages, whispering to one another: “I wuv you, Muweeah. Muweeah says “I wuv you, too, Dawen!” Melts my heart.

8. You’re writing now, like a little copy machine. You mimic every scrap of writing you find, filling up reams of paper with your adorable, wobbly child scrawl.

9. You’ve started singing lately, too, wildly off key and with no respect for rhythm or rhyme. It’s just pure, unadulterated joy at the top of your lungs. These are the moments when I most want to swoop you up into my arms and gobble you up the way I would when you were a baby. I can’t believe how grown up you are now.

10. You have become my little right-hand man over the last few months. You pick out M’s outfit every morning, fetch diapers and wipes for me when she needs a change, empty the dishwasher and always remember to clear your mess up after meals. Sometimes I just sit back and stare at you because this time last year I was wondering if you’d ever be potty trained, worrying that you’d never outgrow the need for a binky, all but puréeing your meals for you and carting you around the city in a stroller. Now I watch you carrying bags of groceries up four flights of stairs for me and I wonder where my baby went. How did you grow up so quickly? Where did you learn all these incredible things you know now? It must be happening while I’m asleep; you’re always a quarter inch taller in the morning than you were when I put you to bed. Some night I’m going to stay awake all night to see if I can actually watch you grow…and that won’t be creepy at all, right? 🙂

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Written by GRSeim

May 8, 2012 at 4:21 am

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